How To Stay Calm And Focused During A High-Conflict Divorce
The end of a marriage can be one of the most difficult experiences a person can face. It’s a time of uncertainty, change, and emotional turmoil. In fact, studies show that divorce is one of the most stressful life events, ranking just behind the death of a spouse or child. When you add contentious legal battles, disagreements over finances, and disputes over custody and support, it’s no wonder that so many people feel overwhelmed during a divorce.
Coping with a stressful divorce can be a lot of work, but it’s nothing you can’t handle with the right mindset and support. Whether you’re in the early stages of a divorce or you are already knee-deep in legal battles, here are some effective strategies to help you come out on the other side stronger and more resilient.
Take Breaks from Social Media
Social media can be a constant reminder of the life you once had and the loss you are experiencing, which can set off feelings of sadness, anger, or resentment. Scrolling through your Facebook or Instagram feed can also expose you to triggering content, such as photos or posts of your ex-spouse or mutual friends, further exacerbating the negative emotions.
So, start by setting some boundaries like limiting your time on social media to a specific amount each day, or even taking a break for a few days or weeks. You can also unfollow or mute accounts that may be causing you stress, especially if your ex or any mutual friends are posting content that upsets you. This can help create a sense of emotional distance and give you space to process your emotions without constant reminders of your past life.
Get Professional Financial Advice
To say that financial stress can add to the strain of a divorce would be an understatement. You may be concerned about dividing assets, alimony payments, or child support, and not knowing what to expect can lead to further anxiety. Consulting a financial expert can help alleviate some of this stress by providing clarity on how to handle your money matters.
Financial advisors can offer valuable insights into how to manage your finances during and after a divorce. They can help you create a budget, identify assets, and manage debt. They can also help you plan for your future financial goals and make sure you’re in a good financial position post-divorce.
If you’re facing a contested divorce where you and your spouse disagree about the division of assets or the amount of support to be paid, a financial advisor can assist in negotiating a settlement you both agree with.
Practice Self-Compassion
Going through a divorce can be mentally exhausting as you go through a range of emotions, from sadness and anger to guilt and self-doubt. During this challenging time, it’s important to be kind and gentle with yourself. You do not need to be perfect or have all the answers – nobody does.
But you must treat yourself with the same compassion you would offer a close friend. This could mean giving yourself permission to rest and recharge when you need it, acknowledging your feelings without judgment, and being patient with yourself as you work through the anger and resentment. Whenever you feel overwhelmed, take a few minutes to practice deep breathing or go for a walk in nature. Try journaling or talking with a trusted friend to vent it all out or gain a new perspective.
Take Care of Your Physical Health
Physical health is closely linked to emotional well-being. In fact, researchers have found that one in three people suffering from a physical health issue also has mental health problem, most often anxiety of depression.
When going through a divorce, it’s like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. It’s easy to get so caught up in the legal complexities that self-care falls to the wayside. But neglecting your physical health during this time is like pouring salt on an open wound – it only adds to the pain and makes things worse.
Make sure to eat nutritious foods to boost your energy, improve your mood, and support your immune system. During a stressful divorce, it can be tempting to reach for the tub of ice cream or the big bag of chips, or skip meals altogether. Based on this, making a conscious effort to eat a balanced diet will help you feel more in control and better equipped to handle stress.
And don’t forget to exercise as it will go a long way in helping lower stress, improve sleep, and boost self-confidence. You don’t need to run a marathon or join a gym to reap the benefits of exercise – even a daily walk or a few minutes of stretching can make a difference.
Consider Alternative Dispute Resolution
Court hearings, legal battles, and lengthy delays that come with a litigated divorce can feel like a never-ending cycle you’re stuck in. But there are alternative ways to resolve disputes way more quickly.
Mediation is one option; it’s a process where a neutral third party helps you and your spouse reach an agreement outside of court. The mediator facilitates communication and helps both parties understand each other’s perspectives. This method can be less adversarial than litigation and can help you maintain control over the outcome of your divorce.
Collaborative divorce is another way where both parties work with attorneys and other professionals to reach a settlement agreement. It can also be less expensive and time-consuming than litigation. If you and your spouse are serious about reducing the emotional and financial toll of divorce, take the time to consider these different options. You may be surprised at how much smoother the process can be when you work together instead of against each other.
Take Control of Your Divorce with the Help of Orange County’s Leading Divorce Attorneys
Divorce is a deeply emotional experience, and staying calm during this process can feel like an impossible feat. But it doesn’t have to be that way. At Werno Family Law Solutions, our team of seasoned divorce attorneys in Orange County, CA is here to help you weather this storm. We will work with you to develop personalized strategies for managing conflict, reducing stress, and protecting your rights.
We believe that divorce doesn’t have to be an aggressive, lose-lose battle, and we are committed to helping you find a way to reach a resolution that works for you and your family. Whether through mediation, collaborative divorce, or litigation, we will work hard and be your staunch advocates every step of the way. Give us a call at 714-942-5932 or contact us online to schedule a free, no-obligations consultation today.